The luxury of time & total immersion

Sounds like a memoir title, right? Only no. It’s the mission statement of a beautiful place I have discovered. Recently I enjoyed some holiday time–pure vacation. Time off. From life. From work. From everything. Time. It’s been a rough transition back, but I’m beyond happy right now. Are you? Maybe this blog post will entertain you, reader. I feel like telling you a story.

I’m hesitant to share information about the place in this post. I don’t want this place to appear in some logarithm or in confusing online search. I don’t want to spoil the beauty of this place’s simplicity by putting it on the Internets. I’m not usually such a hoarder when it comes to joyous places, but this spot is a gem in the American West. A gem worth protecting and cultivating. Let me first describe this place and how we got there. Then I’ll embed the link in one of my sentences so you can learn about it. And if you’re a careful reader of links, you’ll discover this bit of joy that’s like a town at the end of a dusty long road. Then I’ll try to connect this experience to what I’ve been thinking about with teaching and learning which may (or may not) help prepare me for the various commitments I have from now to December.

Writing a blog post is a bit of joy—and after a massive pile of emails during the work week—it’s nice to focus on one continuous line. One project that has a beginning and an end. One project that may be a beginning to the start of something else. One project that may connect to another project. One project that becomes something else entirely. One project that takes time.

Time.

It’s almost the start to our academic quarter and I’ve had three office visits where folks expressed frustration for not having enough time to write. Or how behind they are on things they wanted to accomplish. The time they wasted this summer. The time to write. Time to complete their courses. Time to write me about their ideas for the upcoming year. Time to complete the projects they thought they would do. Time to learn about things they want to learn.

Time.

Quantifying time gets us into the realm of measurement. Calculating, weighing, parsing, divvying, splitting, dividing, planning: it’s all bits of time. And like Bob Dylan teaches us, time—it’s a jet plane. And it moves too fast.

By the time my holiday rolled around, I was ready for some adventure. When it came time for me to take my vacation, I realized what a luxury it is to take off and still get paid. A luxury that still feels new to me even three years into my administrator career—such as it is. As an adjunct, I had so much time. Time without pay changes your holiday spirit. Crushes your sense of adventure. Limits your time. Paralyzes your possibilities. I’m thankful and grateful for this time, and I feel so lucky for this holiday that is now living in my memory.

On this adventure, I got to spend some time with my mountain woman adventure hiking partner, Tami. We both work in higher education, and we’re both not so thrilled about the jobby job right now, and we’re struggling with different things that are similar yet not at all the same. I don’t want to go into that here today. What I do want to do is thank her for being so unbelievably cool and putting up with my really bad singing, my whiny princess tendencies when faced with wind and bad weather, and my crappy-ass attitude when I’m tired and/or hungry.

Case in point, all of our travel plans fell through because of the weather, forest fires, or a rejected permit. We’ve been talking about this trip since January, and when everything fell apart with our plans, and I was kind of in a funk of despair. Here’s what Tami said,

“What about a hot spring and brewery tour from here to Idaho? What about the Sawtooths?”

Can I pause right here and tell you how perfect those two questions are?

If I had to pick a song to express the feelings of my inner mountain woman’s love of adventure, it would be this beauty from Bob and Johnny:

Thank you, Tam, for being so easy to adventure with and here’s my gift to you. If you look closely at the notebook, I think Eddie’s notes say, “I have not met the woman of my dreams, and I know she’s a librarian who fights misinformation. Social justice and fiber art are so sexy. I’ll cover this song and think of her.”

And here’s the thing, we found that north country fair. Idaho state’s version of Atlanta 60 miles down a dirt road, how I love thee. Where to even begin?

In a tweet: The weather turned bad. Drove east. Rad town by way of advice. No maps. Just words. Just horrible notes from books and the Internets #Joyous

I’ve been working on a story/article/idea about the notion and/or burden of safety and learning, so let’s just say, this trip contributed to my research. More on that later.

What a vacation! We drove straight on I-90 down through Oregon and east to Idaho. At sunset, we pulled into the Hilltop Station and the bartenders helped us with directions and recommended the most delightful blood orange IPA. The citrus was light, and the color was sweet IPA so we filled a growler and made a note to stop by on the way home. Got back in the car and drove 30-40 miles down a dirt road until we saw a big black bear scramble amble bamble crack smack scratch up the hillside past the Boise River. Big paws in the headlights climbing up the hillside.

That’s when we decided to call it a night and camp in a spot that looked like a “campsite” on a turnout. Big game on the move with a full-ish moon on a dirt road scares me as a driver. Plus, I was ready to drink that IPA and eat dinner. It was so dark we had no idea what our “site” looked like, but it was free and along the Boise river. We awoke to the most spectacular view with burned trees, a clear river, rocks, and mountains.

We were heading to the trailhead, and a small town. Based on scant maps, good advice, some book learning, and good old fashion technology, we discovered a town that is both for locals and artists with a tiny school and a lovely library.

When we pulled in to Atlanta, there was something about the architecture that just slowed down my sense of time. You just want to look at the wood grain on the buildings. Run your hands along the window frames. Take a nap after sitting on the porch. Feel the sun on your face. Spend some time gazing those Sawtooths. We’re so smitten with this place we’ve been dreaming all week of buying a place there and slipping off the grid forever.

Time.

Naps on Pillows on the Porch After a Hot Spring Soak: A Memoir

If I hyperlink to the best discovery we made to this post, will you read it after you finish this page? Don’t click now. Come back to it. There is a beauty to that style of reading. It’s like a gift. Or a sloppy shift in font color in the paragraph. Depends on how you see hyperlinking. Depends on how you see it.

But really, after you read this post I invite you to come back to this line, check out this lovely website, watch the video, and think. I’m scratching the days off my calendar until I can go to this place either as a teacher, a volunteer, a student, a resident, and/or as Tami’s visitor.

I must enjoy time there. I want to afford the luxury of time and full immersion. Time.

From our first chat with the ranger to our last hug with the bartender, we felt welcomed and a kind spirit of friendliness and hospitality. And some of the folks were so far from us on the political spectrum that we held our tongues when certain comments were made at the bar. We were guests in this town, after all.

Here’s an example: I sat next to a local who we had seen the day before on the porch of the local bar. He hadn’t said a word, and I really wanted to know his story. Unlike his companions who were interested in the two “Seattle Girls” who were there to backpack and fish, he didn’t say a word. I did notice that he chased bees away from a hummingbird feeder. This rugged tough mountain man was looking out for my favorite wee tiny bird. Who can stand it? He could have been hiding four-five hummingbirds in his beard for all I knew.

Over cheap domestic beers, I struck up a conversation with him and we chatted a bit. I pointed out he didn’t talk to us the day before at all, but I noticed that he was helping the hummingbirds by shooing away the bees from the sugar water.

No, the bees are fine, he said. Sometimes hummingbirds land on your finger next to that feeder and I was hoping to show you gals that. And yes, I don’t talk to people unless I think they’re worth it.

With that, I had a new friend, and I was so thrilled. That was a compliment, right? He had a twinkle in his eye and he was very kind. We then started talking about why we were in Idaho. I told him that it all started with us not getting a permit to hike the Wonderland Trail around Mt. Rainier in Washington.

A permit! Whatever happened to this land is your land and this land is mine?

I love that folk song, I said, it’s one of my favorites. You like Woody Guthrie? (I was dying to know what kind music this guy listened to or liked).

I don’t know who sings that song. It’s just not how America is anymore. A permit? To hike in the woods? (long pull off his beer). That’s ridiculous, he said, and he turned to talk to somebody else. Oh man, I was crushed. City Girl Blues.

I sat there pouting a bit and drank my beer while Tami was getting hit on by some divorcee tourist that was not her type. She didn’t seem to need rescuing, and I didn’t want to join their conversation, so I sat there and thought for a bit. What would it be like to grow up in a town like this? What would they think about what I do for a living? What’s it like here in the winter? What do people do for work? What does it look like inside these houses?

How do you explain that when you live in a more populated area, there has to be some way of protecting the wilderness? Permits work.

There has to be some regulation to inform people on how to respect the trails. There are only so many spaces and many, many people. As much as I hate the process of attaining permits, I think it’s a good idea. Not everyone understands the policy of leave no trace. We need a way to rescue people should they get into trouble in the woods. There are only so many places to put a tent. There is only so much space for people. There are only so many people who maintain trails.

One does not have worry about such crowding in Idaho. It’s mountain west beauty.

Here are a few photos. Credit to my friend Tami & her magic photo machine:

Shrink it, pink it, & stink it (lol). Somebody smells bad here.

“Shrink it, pink it, & stink it” (well played, Tam).

Sums up the beauty here.

Sums up the beauty here.

Those trees. Those lakes. Those mountains.

Those trees. Those lakes. Those mountains.

Me & my big ol' pack.

Me & my big ol’ pack.

 

We hiked for over 40 miles without seeing another person. Beautiful country. Mountain West. Time in the mountains.

The clock slowed down. Time was no longer a luxury; it felt like we had found a natural pattern of the life.

No agendas. No projects. No demands. Nothing but time and authentic gratitude for the wilderness as we hiked, wrote, read, napped, talked, fished (Tami), daydreamed (me), cooked, drank, and enjoyed our time.

Time close to here:

The site of the town is admirably adapted to the purpose of building.  It is a picture of serene loveliness reposing quietly in the midst of rugged grandeur and sublimity.  It would seem as if the wildest dream of a poet-prospector had been realized…The town of Atlanta is situated on a smooth plain of about 200 acres, surrounded on all sides by rugged and lofty mountains.  The ground slopes gradually to the river… Across this area runs a creek of good size, affording abundant water power for mills and machinery.  The best timber for every needed purpose abounds in the immediate vicinity. The town contains two hotels, two stores of general merchandise, two butcher shops, two saloons, one drug store… There is an excellent school.  Here water, exactly of the right temperature for bathing, gushes out from near the top of the high perpendicular bank and is caught in a cistern below where graceless bipeds go to revel in the luxuries of the bath in full view of all the salmon in the stream.

-W.A. Goulder, 1876

Oh to be that “graceless biped” again! I’ll conclude by mourning that I’m no longer there and I need to get back to what I should be working on. You know this feeling right? Feel free to grab your own procrastination hair shirt. If you’re reading this at night with your favorite beverage, I toast to you and your own brand of procrastination.

That’s really what this is about, right? The thinking. The learning. The digital record.

Sometimes I wonder—and you may be asking, what is “the this” in your interrogative statement? Ambiguous pronouns!

The this is the curiosity—the fun of sharing your learning as [[the poet-prospector]] that we have all within us. The immersion of luxury enjoying time. The time of immersion with joy. This is what it’s all about sometimes with teaching, learning, and living:

Time. Luxurious Time.

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Disasters & Bicycles

“Stop asking how technology can help you teach and start asking how technology should change how you teach.” ~Mike Caulfield, shadow syllabus for T&L 521

“Renewable assignments also imply a shift in faculty thinking from “grading” to “editing.” For each individual assignment, each individual student is creating an artifact that provides a unique, student-centric view of a topic. This artifact will be learned from and then extended and improved upon by future students.” ~David Wiley, An Obstacle to the Ubiquitous Adoption of OER in US Higher Education

“If disasters such as these happen from time to time, has nobody thought of alternative modes to combustible engines for relief? Why have we not learned from past mistakes that disaster preparedness means considering other means of mobility?” ~From a class blog in 2013 from Portland State University 

photo credit: Me! Capturing the cargo bike of the Hartsoch family at a Cascade Cross race.

photo credit: Me! Capturing the cargo bike of the Hartsoch family at a Cascade Cross race.

Yesterday I published a lofty extensive windbaggery introduction to what I thought I’d be working on for the next two days, but I’ve had some exciting things come up that I need to focus on.

In The Forest Still Burn, I set up what I had hoped to develop, and I will, just not today. Here’s the scene: My friend and I have been planning a backpacking trip since January, and we’re scrambling a bit to change our plans for the fifth time! There are forest fires to the north, to the south, and to the east, and this gigantic rain storm is coming from the west. There are either flashflood warnings (which are terrifying, I’ve been caught in one in Moab, Utah), thunder and lightening (don’t want to be in a tent or on a mountain top), and/or epic levels of rainfall on the way (good for the forest fires, but bad for my feet and my spirit). Check over your shoulders for a swarm of locusts! I’m sure they’re on their way. Sheesh!

For now, I’m going to leave behind the fire lookout research, and focus solely on what I created for Mike Caulfield’s course.

My three epigraphs above reflect some big ideas I’ve been considering since Mike’s blog post about his class.  I made a short video of what I created based on Mike’s syllabus and my scattered thoughts about the federated wiki. I got cut off right as I was about to thank you for listening, and I did not get a chance to say I’m not sure if my pages will be interesting to him, his students, or anyone else, but maybe somebody will find it interesting.

Any comments, thoughts, or ideas are welcomed. I have been called a “federated wiki cheerleader” and I suppose that’s true. It does, however, make me wonder if I was a man would I be called “an advocate” or “supporter” because, you know, “cheerleader” is awfully feminine. I’m going to shrink that thought and pink it with critique another day. Call me what you want as it relates to the federated wiki; I love supporting this project.

I leave for my trip on Saturday, and I’m not sure where we are going or what we are doing. I just know I won’t have my magic typewriter, fair readers. My magic typewriter will just have to wait until I return. What will you do with your magic typewriter?

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The Forests Still Burn

“None of us expected the future to arrive so soon.” ~Ira Spring, providing the historical perspective about fire lookouts in Washington State.

This post is the first of three that I plan to publish this week. My plan is to describe a parallel I’m seeing with teaching and learning, the history of fire lookouts, and the federated wiki. Ready for this, readers? It’s kind of out there.

Back in February, my friend sent me an email inviting me to go to the Evergreen Mountain Fire Lookout. I read the trail description and agreed that this was a beautiful spot we should check out. When we were first planning on going, I only thought of the view and the elevation gain of the hike. Little did I know how much history I would learn thanks to this trip and it’s now a bit of an obsession with me.

First of all, you need to know that Washington State is currently suffering through a terrible fire season. Forest fires are a natural part of the evolution of forests, and it’s a necessary part of biodiversity. There are trees that will not release their seeds without the heat of fire. Lightning strikes happen or people make mistakes; forests burn. The trouble, of course, is when these fires threaten humans, communities, and our homes. The stories of loss and devastation this summer is almost too much for me to take. Despite all of our technology; Mother Nature is reminding us of how little we can control our environment. My first recollection of learning about forests burning was the 1988 Yellowstone National Park fires.

I remember reading the newspaper and being fascinated by the size of the fire. I had yet to travel to the western United States, so I didn’t have an idea of the scale of the western states. The images haunted me. The helicopters. The devastation. The sad photos of displaced animals. The story of hawks hunting in burning brush. People dying. This was the drought that challenged the park policy of “let it burn.” The flames kept growing in one of our national treasures.

Five years later, I was a park employee hiking through those charred woods and the wildflowers were unlike anything I’d ever seen. It’s was a spooky beautiful landscape that I couldn’t get enough of seeing and exploring. Hikers were warned to stay away from “black ghost trees” that could fall on you should you disturb them. I remember touching the bark of trees and they felt like greasy charcoal. I remember seeing an owl perched high on a branch of a black dead tree. The suburban city girl I was quickly changed her mind that forest fires were not pure evil. They are part of nature, and that is a stance I hold to this day.

What troubles me deeply, of course, is the loss of human and animal life and the destruction of communities when these fires are out of control. This summer in Washington State, the fires have been just that—out of control. Our neighbors to north in Canada and to the south in Oregon and California have also suffered through an unnaturally hot dry summer. I have friends who live in these communities. I love their forests. Their downtowns. Their culture. Their firefighters. Their trees. Their skylines.

I tell you all of this because I’ve been going down the rabbit hole researching about fire lookouts, how I could teach people to use the federated wiki, and the importance of technology we could use to collaborate to solve problems and/or to learn. I’m currently on holiday until September 8, and I had decided to work on an article about hiking to lookouts. I have plans to write presentations for the fall. I also have some plans to go off the grid backpacking in Olympics after doing some vacationing in my hometown with my bikes–there are no long hikes in the North Cascades right now. It’s too dangerous.

So here I am, I’ve got my whole holiday planned out. Hobby Jobs, here I come! Then I saw a tweet from Mike Caulfield about his educational technology course along with an invite to folks who are using the federated wiki. C’est moi! When I first read, Kathryn Shultz’s “The Really Big One” I was thinking about forest fires and fire lookouts. When the earth shakes, fires will burn, the writer warns us. I have a lot of friends who grew up in this state, and their response to this article was “Meh. I’ve been hearing that my whole life. It’s really well-written and interesting. I haven’t been to Seaside, Oregon since I was a kid…” Meanwhile, I was like, “Holyhell! What?! Wait. What?! You’re reminiscing about a beach town and shit might be going down big time! Aren’t you the least freaked out about this? Didn’t you guys live through the explosion of Mt. St. Helens?”

Didn’t you grow up where they’re are hurricanes and tornadoes? they snarked. Whatevs.

A couple of people tweeted about how cyclists will be better off should the earthquake come. Anyways, the friends I talked to were underwhelmed, but I kept thinking about this article when a couple of books showed up from my blitz order of fire lookout history books from the public library.

Why have so many of the lookouts disappeared? Was it the advance of technology? Did people vandalize them? So I took some notes in the federated wiki thinking maybe I’ve got an idea for a hiking article. It’s been awhile since I’ve done this kind of writing. To hell with the article (for now), I’m going to take another approach. I’m going to try to create a few pages in the federated wiki that may be of interest to Mike’s students and I’m going to continue with my fire lookout article research. But first, I want to add some context on why I’m interested in this course, Mike’s use of the federated wiki in a class, and maybe just maybe how this all connects to the history of lookouts. 

The course that Mike is teaching seems similar to the course I took for my M.Ed. that changed everything for me. I almost dropped out of my program because I heard a lot about this class and I deemed it a waste of my time. I sent an eloquent (I thought) appeal to my advisor about how I didn’t need this course. I substantiated that I already knew everything this teacher was planning on teaching and that I wanted to do an independent study. He never returned my email, so I put that class off to the very end. News came that the teacher retired and they hired a tenure-track professor to teach it. She won a grant to be an early adopter of Canvas and I rejoiced when I looked her up and read about her interests.

I entered the course, however, with a really really really bad attitude. I blogged about this and now that I reread my thinking, I sense my budding frustration with education programs. For the most part, I experienced classes where they made students create hypothetical situations to apply what they’ve learned to a situation that they may face in the future. David Wiley brilliantly summarizes these assignments as ‘disposable assignments’ and I was lucky because I had almost eight years of teaching experience to draw from when I started this program. I watched my new-to-teaching colleagues struggle to make up scenarios. Struggle to reflect on things that may or may not happen. And we were bored out of our minds reflecting on our reflections about our reflective learning. “Renewable assignments” such as what Mike is proposing is exactly what is needed in education programs.

And yes, I can see how you may see these “renewable assignments” as a new buzzword and I’ll be the first to agree those terms in higher education are annoying. But are they harmful? Yes and no. Jeffrey Young, in Buzzwords May Be Stifling Teaching Innovation, lists current buzzwords and the survey responses of Chronicle readers. Here’s the thing, that I thought of when I read this article. Depending on your upper-administration those terms either help us in educational technology or they hurt us. If your upper-administration trusts you to help teachers experiment, then rock on, those terms allow them stay out of your way. They don’t have time to learn what they are, but they know it may be worth while exploring if you advise them.

If your upper-administration micro-manages your every move and doubts your expertise and vision, then those terms are going to hurt you. It’s even worse if they think you’re attracted to ideas because you’re ambitious. Should you work in an environment where you lack support, it’s in your best interest to define these terms before the upper-administration does in the form a grant or an initiative. Let’s have a beer or five and talk about this sometime. 

And really, there are too many problems in higher education to count, but let me tell you something, if there is something we need to burn down to the ground, it’s the way we teach future teachers.

I caught my first glimpse of the problem when I took a course at a local university on the state tuition waiver. They had rejected me from their College of Education PhD program and I wanted to know if I was truly outclassed by the people who got in. Who beat me? What did they have that I didn’t? What can I do to improve? So I showed up for the first night of the course after teaching three composition courses at two different colleges, and as I listened to people introduce themselves. I realized I was the only person in the room with any teaching experience. The rest were students hoping to become high school principals yet none of them, I mean, not a one, had any classroom experience. They were all bilingual and had impressive undergraduate credentials, and I realized that on paper, I could never compete with their applications. As the class progressed, I started to really pay attention to the professor and her teaching assistant. They were working on an article together and our class was an experiment for them. And that’s cool, but I never felt so stifled as a student. They both had to approve my works cited before I could write my paper. When I tried to explain that I tend to write and research as I go, they shut me down with the threat of a bad grade. They needed to give me a stamp of approval for what I would cite. A blog post, for the record, got the red pen. “Not peer reviewed” despite the 20 or so articulate blog responses and tweets from scholars in the field. That not-scholar-enough-blogger was George Siemens [WTF, right? Insert laugh track here]. 

In short, I was in a class of future leaders who had never taught before and the teachers were more invested in their publication than our learning. We didn’t use any technology other than Microsoft Word in that class, and despite all of the great information we could have used from the Internet (it was 2007), we were limited to certain databases and sources. I walked away with a paper that was unpublishable in any peer-reviewed journal because I had to include first-person reflection and I swallowed the acute realization I’ll never get into an R1 school. Oh, and yeah, I got an A.

This story connects to why I’m interested in the federated wiki for three reasons and let me use some educator-speak to explain. 1] I have a lot of formal education experience with certificates and degrees. The curriculum was set by the institution and accredited. All that jazz. 2] I have a lengthy history with non-formal learning with my personal interests. I’ve taken classes on avalanche safety, trail-crew work, sewing, astrology, candle-making, stained glass cutting, and cyclocross racing, to name a few. Every course had a somewhat organized set of outcomes with an expert who changed the curriculum based on the learners in the class. Jazzed up learning! 3] Where the magic and joy happens for me as a learner is when my learning is informal, or what I prefer to call self-directed learning. (If you know this debate, I don’t agree that informal learning is unintentional whereas self-directed learning is a type of informal learning that is purposeful and truer to my pedagogical worldview. In short, it’s semantics and it’s confusing to people to explain the difference between informal and nonformal).

Think of learning in three ways: formal learning helps you get a job (The Man), informal learning helps you grow as a person in your community (The People), and self-directed learning is pure selfish blissful learning for learning’s sake (The Self). Now before you want to tear apart my explanation because I have really simplified these definitions, let me explain. Our goal in higher education, for the best educators, is to have students experience informal and self-directed learning and love our discipline the way we do in the formal setting. We want them to be lifelong learners. Citizens who are interested in improving the world we live in. We want them to find meaningful work. 

But I’ve got to tell you, nothing kills that self-directed spirit more than a set curriculum. Nothing puts out the fire of curiosity like dull formal education. Maybe you’ve been out of college for awhile. Maybe you’ve had some joy with MOOCs. Maybe you’ve just started college. Maybe you’re an administrator. Maybe you’re just starting graduate school. Maybe you’re questioning if I am just too pessimistic. Maybe I’m way off. Here’s what I know.

If I had to think of a song that summarizes how formal education feels to me after years and years of it, I’ve got a song for you. You know that point where Johnny Rotten from The Sex Pistols says “No fun” over and over againI know Iggy Pop sings this song too, but he makes “no fun” sound cool and kind of badass loner-like. Johnny, however, back in his prime, tells the story of gritty, nasty, boredom–a frustrating lack of joy. No fun. No fun. My babe, no fun.

And this lack of fun–No Fun!–really frustrated me when I started to research writing. That class, for most students, is the last English class they will ever have to take. And they hate it. Adjuncts, by and large, are the ones who get stuck teaching it. Students walk into the class with the same bad attitude that I described above about my Ed Tech class. I’ve been researching since fifth grade, they think, and now I’ve got to take this class? I realized early on I was not going to win students over with my love of the written word. Who gives a rat’s ass, lady? English majors are suckers! I want to be a nurse/engineer/chemist/etc. and this class might kill my GPA.

So I took another approach as a teacher. Instead of droning on about the syllabus the first day, I asked them to write for about five minutes about what they liked to learn about using the Internet or magazines on their free time. When you’re not doing homework, what do you like to learn about? I’d then write on the board their responses everything from making homemade baby food to World of WarCraft to hunting to make-up techniques to dirt bike racing. Depending on what I was into, I’d write my hobby job research. I’d then ask them to write the three big questions that they have about their interests and where they would look up information. By then, class would be over and I’d ask them to come back with a list of their sources, their three questions about their personal research, and any questions about the syllabus. Are you going to collect this, they’d ask?

If I collect it, does it change the way you would do it? I’d ask. Silence.

At that point, I’d laugh and give my first “You’re in college now, I want you think for yourself, speech. If you do everything for grades, college is going to be a huge waste of your time.” Most of the students would relax. A few would drop my class the second they could get to a computer. There were always one or two who would stay behind class completely freaked out that I didn’t give them a rubric or written instructions for their homework. These were students, I realized, that had never found the joy in self-directed learning. When I collected their what-do-you-research-for-fun, they listed academic-type research connected to their future profession. Maybe that was fun for them, but I don’t think so.

So how does this connect to my learning about fire lookouts? I’ll return to this in my next post and I’ll link my new pages in the federated wiki. 

photo credit: http://bit.ly/1Jwg3cg

photo credit: http://bit.ly/1Jwg3cg

For now, here’s what I’m thinking: this past weekend, I hiked to Lookout Mountain Lookout and I sat outside reading the log book from visitors that dated back to the mid-90s. There were pages and pages of reflections from strangers who wrote things similar to what I would write. They also wrote things I would never think of and that got me reflecting on my use of the federated wiki and my own education. I forked a couple pages by taking photos of them.

I was having a lot of fun even though the mold in the books made me sneeze every ten minutes. I realized I rarely experienced some of the serendipitously fun learning I’ve had in the last year when I was a student.

The federated wiki works like that log book. You leave your thoughts for others. That history is left for somebody else. It’s a bit of The Self and The People. And imagine, Mike Caulfield’s students are going to get formal credit using the federated wiki. I then stared into space for who knows how long. That’s why I love the backcountry.

The wind picked up, so I went inside to read Ira Spring’s Lookouts: Firewatchers of the Cascades and the Olympics, the first edition. 

His opening paragraph describes how in the 1930s, the fire lookouts were a cutting edge technological solution to the problem of wildfires in Washington State. He describes how they built a network of lookouts staffed by people who communicated by hiking, horse travel, radio, and mail. They saw themselves as pioneers saving their communities from natural devastation and the destructive forces of wildfires.

Then technological advances such as the helicopter, satellite communication, and other communication tools left no need for the fire lookouts. Many of them have been destroyed or they remain in various states of disrepair. This history has almost been erased, yet there is a great deal we can still learn.

Spring’s tone is full of melancholy as he reflects on this lost history, “None of us expected the future to arrive so soon.”

None of us still expect the future–be it an earthquake or another natural disaster– to arrive so soon. The future arriving soon. Think about that.

We now have technology to help us, right?

And yet the forests still burn. The forests still burn.

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Choose Your Own Federated Wiki Adventure

Remember choose your own adventure books? As a kid, I loved those books because they let me decide where the character goes. What happens. Why. I got to choose, and I bet I felt like the writer that I hadn’t figured out I wanted to be as a little girl. Being the gigantic nerdling I was, I read every option. I remember going all book critic by defacing library books and offering advice on the best adventure for the next reader. I’d write, “The wizard turns evil. Choose p. 96, the princess comes back to life.” As an adult, I’m horrified that I defaced public property but I bring this up not to shame my younger self, but as a way to contextualize two ways I think the federated wiki could work for writers, teachers, and students.

First, I’m trying–and I emphasize trying–to write a book using the federated wiki. What if I could play with the form of the novel and give readers the option to read a self-contained story where they choose what to read next? I haven’t figured out how to do this nor is my writing any good. I’m trying to think of an adult version of the choose your own adventure book where the story is embedded in the content and the timeline of the story isn’t as important as trying to encourage readers to read in a different way. What if I could design a reading experience where people take a path that they want? There is no map. No beginning, no ending, or right order.

Here’s my theory: most people read with hyperlinks by either ignoring them altogether or they click on them as they read. This click-as-you-read kills your concentration and you end up with this smattering of open windows and a colossal mess on your computer screen where you can’t remember where you started or what the heck you were even reading. I witnessed this first hand as a teacher and as an instructional designer. Too many links are bad for students who struggle with reading comprehension and critical thinking. They just become blue words and lines that they ignore or worry that they’ll miss something that was hyperlinked on a quiz.

If I could teach people how to read my Fedwiki book by reading all of the page and then choosing the link that interests them, I’d create an open invitation to choose your own adventure with what I hyperlink. Maybe I’ll create a neighborhood of readers and writers who will add to this idea. Why not? But that’s a gigantic sloppy mess for another day mixed with ambition, passion, motivation, despair, and a story that won’t let me go. For some reason, I’m having a lot of fun thinking about this book whereas before it made me feel like a gigantic failure.

At one point, I stopped seeing any new adventures until I started writing the history of my ideas–such as they are–using the federated wiki.

But that’s not where it gets interesting for me.

The intersection of this choose-your-own-adventure-by-changing-the-way-you-read with portfolio potential for teaching and learning bubbles to the surface of my thoughts more often than the novel potential. Because this is what the federated wiki is for, man, it’s for The People! Not just navel gazing selfish writers (a memoir).

So that brings me to the forking of [[Forced Conviviality]] and an idea that I was hoping to work on more before NW eLearn. I’m presenting on the federated wiki, and my title makes it sound like I know what I’m talking about—only I don’t. Here’s my title:

Time in the Federated Wiki: Portfolio Potential From The Happenings

Sounds fancy, right?

I’ve got a hunch that won’t let me go. And this all feels a bit like choosing my own adventure. I’ll be the first to tell you that I really have no idea what I’m talking about and that’s really fun for me. That’s the necessary condition of the hobby job–it’s gotta be fun or I’m out.

Meanwhile back at the jobby job, I’ve been tasked with writing initiatives as they relate to teaching and learning and professional development. In short, what are we going to teach teachers and value as the face of eLearning/educational technology on our campus? I’m not short on ideas or things that we could do. Here’s the link if you’re interested in reading more, but I’m struggling with how to assess that teachers and students will benefit from these projects in order to legitimize funding. How will I know that these ideas will work? How will I know what teachers have learned? How will I know? How will I create data? How will I connect helping teachers to student success? Where is the distillery in the woods that employs yetis to make moonshine? Wait. Sorry, that’s not a question.

This is where I’m struggling because here’s the 411 y’all. It feels impossible–or close to impossible–to measure professional development for teachers as it relates to student success. If you define “student success” in terms of retention and completion, well, I’m not your gal. Let’s talk about learning then I’m your gal. What I think works and what I’ve learned from others is that discipline-specific professional development is easy to measure. Send faculty to a new conference where presenters share the findings of a research project. Faculty incorporate that information into their courses. Students learn about it. Boom! Assessed. Here’s your pile of money.

Teaching people to think differently about the way they teach with technology is not so easy. Purse strings cinch. Eye brows get raised. Teaching people to collaborate with their colleagues is not so easy. Teaching people and then have them change is not so easy. The data is harder to gather. This pressure about retention, completion, and data kills everything that I love about teaching and learning. The Choose Your Own Adventure book becomes a boring spirit killing training manual that nobody wants to read.

And this was my rant to a friend, a fellow teacher, who said, “Just make sure you don’t create situations of forced conviviality. It’s got to be worth people’s time and leave teachers excited to learn more on their own. Forcing people to learn, last I checked, doesn’t work.”

When I got back to work I couldn’t remember if the phrase was enforced or forced, so I used the federated wiki to take notes. I decided to make a short video to explain because my first draft confused me, dear readers, so let me spare you by making you suffer through a video: http://screencast.com/t/3wwX1O8C

In Tools for Conviviality, Ivan Illich reminds us that “Trust in miracle cures obliterated good sense and traditional wisdom on healing and healthcare.”

If I could have forked this page, here’s how I’d revise it: Trust in miracle cures obliterates good sense and traditional wisdom with teaching and learning.

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You’re The Only One I Can Tell

“You know,” she said, “this is either going to be the best adventure ever or the biggest mistake of my life. What do you think?”

I wish I could say I had some words of wisdom or brave statements full of empowerment for my friend, but I’ll admit it: I totally cracked up.

“If you tell me that’s a great memoir title, I’m going to punch you. Seriously, dude, I need some advice.”

Then I lost it laughing so hard, I almost had to pull the car over. Here I am driving my friend, one of my closest friends ever, to a trail head so we can spend two days in the back-country and she’s pouring her heart to me. Big huge life changes are afoot for her. She’s trying to get a new job, and although I begged her to not check her voicemail before we left, she did. And they offered her the job.

So I told her what I think she should do. Salary, location, and job description are the holy trifecta of employment happiness. If it’s too much of a pay cut, then don’t do it. If you’re not sure you will love the place, maybe you shouldn’t do it. If they don’t tell you specifically what you’re going to be doing, don’t do it. I composed myself and offered a longish lecture on what I’d say. How I’d say it. What I’d ask for. What I’d ask about.

She looked at me. “I need to write that down, and you’re only one I can tell.”

So here’s the thing: when somebody tells you you’re the only one she can talk to about something, it’s a lot of pressure. You need to be a good friend–A fine fellow human being who can help guide somebody you love. Only I have no idea what I’m talking about nor can I say for sure what I would do. Teetering between a giant mistake and a grand adventure, however, is better than being bored out of frickin’ your mind. Trust me. This I know for sure.

We’re making plans this week, and I thought I’d send her a list of songs for the next seven days. I need to spice it up and have some fun. You need some fun on a Monday, right? Right.

Monday will be the same as it ever was:

 Tuesday, I’ll be there:

Wednesday, pack your bags to do this:

Thursday:
Friday-Sunday:
And really, if she busts out a question like that on me as we’re heading into the woods this weekend, I’ll have this song on queue:
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Mentoring New-ish Faculty

In my last blog post, I promised I’d continue my thoughts on the horrors of adjunctification/causualisation in higher education, but I’ve got to take step away for a bit. My adjuncts friends are facing an awful reality in the upcoming year, and I’d rather think about practical ways I can help them on my campus.

Before I do, I need to tell y’all about this awesome soul funk band I heard last weekend. For Seattle folks, this band isn’t anything new, but I have never seen Grace Love and The True Loves live. Hot diggity dog they were awesome.

Let me be clear, I dislike jamband funk ala Phish or what I call frat boy funk (sorry, if you dig that music). The real deal is influenced by James Brown, Aretha Franklin, and/or Curtis Mayfield, and if I don’t hear that influence, it’s not my brand of soul funk. And y’all, Grace Love and The True Loves are the real deal. My hip still hurts from dancing in the grass at Bellingham’s Subdued Stringband Jamboree. What a fun party for kids, musicians, and friends. And I like the way Grace Love works it; have a listen:

I’ve fallen off the jobby job horse a bit over the last few weeks; I’ve lost a bit fire, but holy hot damn, I think I’m back in the saddle. For this post, I’d like to write a bit about my work with the eLearning Council and a fun puzzle we’re facing in my department.

First of all, I sometimes can’t believe how lucky I am to have stumbled onto working with such an amazing group of eLearning Directors in Washington State. Not only have they embraced me as a friend and colleague, they elected me chair-elect of our council. Maybe I’m the only one dumb enough to fall on this sword (I’ve been told) or they actually have faith in me. Either way, it’s a huge honor. We had our first meeting this past week, and Chris Soran is our new chair.

Chris and I were interim at the same time, and we bonded over our unknown status of employment when we first met. I also didn’t know what I was doing and he was really generous to help me out. We also worked together on a work group, and we were the only ones who routinely showed. People get busy and such, but Chris was always there when I clicked on our Collaborate link. As our current Chair, he reports to our Instruction Commission (IC), and this is also my destiny in less than two weeks. Our entire system is going through an upgrade and Tacoma Community College is the first to “go-live,” he needs to be at the home institution. I’m going to interrupt my vacation and head to Big Bend Community College to hang out with all of the Vice Presidents of Instruction in Washington State. You know, no pressure.

I could have said no; I’m on vacation. Honestly, I want to be as close as I can to this caldron as they brew up plans for the upcoming year. I presented to the IC back in May 2014. My colleague, Peg Balachowski,  presented virtually while I stood there and watched the group take notes. Or check their email. Or Facebook. What I noticed was all of them looked up when we mentioned funding and data. I closed the presentation, and many of the VPIs had positive feedback.

At the time, we were short on data with our work, and we still are. And now some of our institutions are even shorter on funding. This year is going to be interesting.

Fun drinking game digression: Drink if you hear the word “austere” or “innovative solutions” or “budget uncertainty” or “tough decisions” or “educational technology will save us money” or “the flipped classroom is a new style of teaching” or my personal favorite, “we can do more for less.” Drink!

As a council, we have work groups to help with state-wide initiatives based on the IC work plan. The eLC meets quarterly in person and monthly OL. It’s a fun side project, and I think this year, we’ve got some awesome momentum with three topics: Accessibility, Professional Development, and Open Pedagogy.

Open Pedagogy?! Did I hear that right?! If I could have skipped arm in arm with my mates to meet as a group, I would have. That’s how excited I am for this work. We still need the stamp of approval from the IC, but I think we’ve got a great start. Usually the IC tells us what they want, and this year they’ve asked us to come up with a plan as subject matter experts. Be still my heart. Perhaps it’s the legacy of our eLC Chairs passing the torch to Chris, the leadership at the SBCTC, and/or a changing of the guard at the IC. Whatever it is, it feels a bit like I could see a mermaid swimming by at any minute.

And back at the home institution, we’re using this summer to solve a data collection problem as we reorganize a bit as a department. Back in 2012-2013, we won a Title III grant. At that time, I was hired as a faculty mentor along with three other faculty members. We collaborated together to create our Associate Faculty Academy. This work is near and dear to my heart because it A] benefits adjuncts by paying them to learn about our institutional culture, B] helps them establish a network with other new adjuncts, and C] it was my second gig as an Instructional Designer.

If I may be a bit nostalgic here with a lesson that I learned the hard way, let me just advise, never ever say to three fantastically motivated brilliant teachers: “Send me all of your stuff and I’ll figure out how to organize it.” Oh dear!

At that time, we were transitioning from ANGEL to Canvas, so everything we had was smoldering pile of nonsensical repository information. The mentors have since revised and revamped that original class, and when I was promoted to my current position, I had to let this project go. It was like mourning a lost love to me, but I rejoice every time we share this this idea with another institution. Five institutions in our system have all tailored the course and the process for what works for them culturally and financially. Interested? Contact me and I’ll send you everything we have.

From the get-go, we’ve been talking about proof of cost. How do we pay for this once the grant runs out? How do we institutionalize this? How do we make this work? How do we know this will work? How do we mentor such a broad spectrum of teachers? These are the big questions I love to try and answer.

At that time, I had also published an article on what I thought could work but I had no idea. My main point was to make sure we set up interdisciplinary mentorships. In short, if you want educators to talk about pedagogy, you’ve got to get folks from different disciplines together. It’s also safer adjuncts to network with people who are outside of their departments. Honestly I was pitching what I wished had existed when I was an adjunct by passing this idea off as research. It’s creative non-fiction disguised as research. (Drink!) Somehow it got published and other folks have since embraced this idea.

I still have no data to prove I’m right (a memoir). So I keep reading and researching. Hoping. Listening. Learning. Asking. Wishing. Waiting. Trying.

Today I read 10 Ways To Support New Faculty by Tanya Golash-Boza, and I have to say, it’s nice to see other writers talking about mentoring. Everybody is all a-twitter with talk about Week 0 for students. (Drink!)

And here’s the thing, we need to also talk about Week -1 for teachers. My institution has a good story that we could connect to Golash-Boza and others. We’ve got great anecdotes. Narratives. Quotes. Examples. Ideas. Visions.

Great stories don’t cut it with peer reviewers; they want data. We’re short on data. We can’t say for sure that what we’ve done helps student retention. We can’t say for sure we help make good teachers better. We can’t say for sure that our way is the right way. We can’t say anything for sure. Nothing. For sure.

The more I think about our lack of data, I think I have one idea to generate numbers. But first, I need to give you some historical context.

At the time we transitioned to Canvas in 2012-2013, three major institutional shifts took place. First, we started the Title III Strengthening Institutions Grant establishing the mentors, the Associate Faculty Academy, and a precedent to mentor new faculty. We defined “new faculty” as new-to-our-college. We decided to care about the majority of the teachers who teach our students. We call them adjuncts. (Drink!)

Second, our math department began linking their third party integration publisher materials to Canvas or they started using OER in greater numbers. Students were starting to identify Canvas with their course schedule. If they didn’t see their math class, they called eLearning. Peg made a template that the math department could use guiding the students to whatever the teachers used, WAMAP, MyMathLab, etc. Our phones stopped ringing and help tickets connected to math classes ceased. One simple message to students was all it took.

Third, we also started an academy for full-time tenure track faculty. Peg, who is the mentor/teacher of this academy, uses Canvas for her cohort of new FT teachers. Canvas, unlike the labyrinth of crappy folders we call ANGEL/Blackboard, is easier to use for both students and faculty. I’ve been arguing that Canvas forces good design on teachers for about a year, and I think this is true, BUT I don’t know for sure. I don’t have the data to prove it.

Maybe we don’t get as many tickets and problems through eLearning because teachers are better supported. Is it Canvas or is it our investment in professional development for teachers? Is it both? Is it my Instructional Designer? Our departmental collaboration? The way we communicate to our faculty? Is it the students themselves? Maybe new faculty are more comfortable with technology. Depends on the discipline. We just can’t say for sure.

I have a theory that what we’re doing to support teachers directly impacts students who are using Canvas. I also believe that we can trace student retention if we got smarter about how to use the Canvas analytic functions. We also need to collaborate with Institutional Research, and currently we don’t work with them at all. More importantly, we need to teach teachers about how these analytics and statistics work. Or don’t work. We also need to educate the administration that this data does not reflect what the students are actually learning. This love affair about analytics is dangerous while at the same time potentially useful. We just need to make sure we ask the right questions.

Quick disclaimer: I want to kill all LMSs forever and ever, but we’re so invested as a college and as a system that I have to live with it. I also understand that I overwhelm people with these ideas, and I have to get smarter about the way I explain why this needs to be the future of teaching and learning. I have to learn how to talk about this idea to people who have never heard of a Domain of One’s Own. Worse still, I think I need to take a statistics class again. (Drink!)

Back to what I’d like to investigate:

What if we could track the use of Canvas post-Academies? In other words, what if we ask all of our new and former mentees to connect one outcome to multiple assessments in their courses? Just one. It doesn’t have to be huge. Just one. We could take it one step further and ask teachers to connect that outcome to their course evaluations via the IDEA form. I really dislike this teacher evaluation form, but nobody listens to me. It’s meaningless for teachers and devalues the potential of student feedback. It’s a giant waste of money, but it’s how we do it at my institution. (Drink!)

If we could do this one-outcome-multiple-assessments research during the tenure-track process alone, we’d have three years of data on one outcome per teacher. We could advise our new teachers to join “an innovative pilot” to collaborate with eLearning. (Drink!) This will help them in the dog and pony show we can tenure track process. It doesn’t seem threatening to me, and we’d let them choose the outcome. They can work with my Instructional Designer on that one-outcome-to-multiple-assessment alignment. Maybe, just maybe, they’ll take a sip of our Kool-Aid and join our little club. We’re fun people. We care. We want their students to succeed. We respect them as subject matter experts.

This is just a nascent idea, but I’m trying to think of how we can generate data to show that teachers improve when they A] use Canvas, B] understand alignment, and C] value continuous improvement in their courses post the academies. I’m willing to bet they have better retention numbers. Better classes. Happier students who enjoy learning. Teachers who love working with us. Happier people who enjoy learning together.

The pieces are there; we just need to figure out how to bring them together. Maybe I need a mentor to help me stitch these pieces of quilt together. Maybe I need to get smarter with statistics. Maybe the answer is right in front of me, but I can’t see it.

Here’s the heart-breaking reality of this work of mentoring new-ish faculty, many of them say that this experience is the first time somebody welcomed them to an institution beyond showing them how to make copies or how to call security. They report that they feel cared about and it’s nice to have a network. I’ve walked by some of them on campus and they light up because they know somebody. I don’t always remember their names or their disciplines but I say hello and smile. I have no data to prove this, but I think we’re making teaching a less lonely profession.

“I don’t feel so all alone for the first time ever as a teacher,” said one faculty who had almost 14 years of adjunct teaching experience.

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Abandoning The Broken Peloton

Three things make my heart beat faster with anticipation: News from the cycling world, brilliantly useful critiques about higher education, and compositional artistry from scholars I respect. And leave it to the fabulous Kate Bowles to bring all three together for me after four days off the grid. My bloated inbox, job applications/inquiries, reports, and mounting list of reading all be damned! I must respond.

First of all, you need to read Service as Service, her post from August 2, 2015 since this post is the beginning of a longer response.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the word “abandoned” since I watched Fabian Cancellera and Tejay van Garderen “abandon” the tour. They are not the only riders who had to leave via the broom wagon, but they are the ones whose absence haunted me the most this year during Le Tour de France. Cancellera saddened me because he’s such a classy skilled rider and his 2010 wins of Paris Roubaix  and the Tour of Flanders were exciting and beautiful watch. I was especially impressed with how he handled accusations about his victories. Rumor had it that he had a special bike with a motor to increase his speed. It was the technology not his ability that got the rumor mill spinning. He tested negative for doping, so his bike must be dirty.

At the time, it seemed like a nice way to divert the negative press about doping. Allegations were rampant, denials were cocky, and everyone was suspicious of a rider who takes off at the front. In short, if you were winning, you must be cheating.

VeloNation Press  in 2010 quotes Cancellera and gives some context to how he felt about the accusations:

The Swiss rider said that the story is laughable. Almost. “In fact, it’s pretty funny but it is such a big story that it’s no longer the case. It’s a sad story and really outrageous. Don’t worry, my accomplishments are the result of hard work,” said Cancellara.

Whether the motor was his legs or some ingenious hidden motor in his bike frame has been debated ad nauseum by fans and the press. Every bike mechanic I know laughed at the accusations and I agree with them. We need Fabian’s Magic Bike and we’ll win, we joked. But really, it’s his hard work that gives him the fitness and grace to ride a bike that way. He’s an interesting rider because he has not enjoyed the team support that some of his rivals have yet he’s incredibly popular with fans. I’ve been a huge fan ever since I started watching cycling news regularly, so I was devastated to see his name listed as an “abandoned rider.”

This also made me question why they use the word “abandoned” and I have not looked up the history of this term in cycling. If you know it, I’d love to learn. When I looked up the term abandoned, in the dictionary, they give us three definitions:

: to leave and never return to (someone who needs protection or help)

: to leave and never return to (something)

: to leave (a place) because of danger

If we take a look at video as posted on Kate’s blog, we get 47 seconds of sadness from van Garderen. Watching somebody abandon his dreams while he was in a position to compete for a podium position was/is awful to witness. During the live broadcast, they showed the entire scene from him getting off the bike to him getting into the car. It was a moment of voyeurism mixed with horror that made me get up from the television. I couldn’t watch. They almost had to tear the bike off of him and you could tell he was crying. It was too much for me to watch. To witness.

As an American cycling fan, I see van Garderen as a post-Lance Armstrong era potential hero. Watching a broadcast of the tour and only hearing Armstrong’s name three times is shocking and sad for the sport of cycling in the US. Doping is not a cycling-specific phenomenon but Armstrong’s denials then confessions has not helped the sport progress in recent years. The moment he sat down in Oprah Winfrey’s chair, sponsors fled from cycling en mass. This has been most tragic for privateers, women, and young racers.

Unlike Cancellera, van Garderen is young. Check out his list of accomplishments on Wikipedia; it’s impressive. He can still come back and have a few years of competing. His career is on the rise; he’s a kid with promise. Cancellera, however, is long in the tooth, and his best years may be behind him. He may or not retire in 2016, and that’s why his abandonment was so heartbreaking. As a fan, you just want to see him win or be in the yellow jersey one more time. You want to see him time trial one more time. And that may not happen, and as a fan, you have to accept that one more time may not happen. That’s sport.

And these things haunt me. I think about how that abandonment must feel, what it’s like to see the Tour from a bed as you recover. Just bring up Joseba Beloki in my presence and I feel ill. His career ending crash is so awful for him and his team. Here you have a team who works together for an entire year just for three weeks, one crack of melting pavement and it’s over. One injury and there is no one more time. No time.

For non-cycling fans, let me explain a bit. Every team has a Grand Classification (GC) rider, or somebody who can compete to win the major tours. Teams are split up by members who have certain roles in the race. Some sprint, some time trial, but most are assistants to the potential winner, the GC. Everyone sacrifices for the GC. Should that GC person get injured or abandon the race, they’re taking on the weight and the disappointment of their entire team, nation, family, sponsors, and community. It’s especially hard for the domestiques who will never see individual glory, kiss a podium girl on the top step, or wear a jersey. They do a lot of the hard work during the race yet they never get much, if any, credit. The GC gets the spotlight and the domestiques helped him to get to that top step.

In a team competition that looks very much like an individual sport, the abandonment revises the entire job of everyone on the team.  All of the domestiques who have trained to protect Cancellera should he get the yellow jersey after the time trial. All of the domestiques who trained to help block the wind as van Garderen climbed up mountains. They too abandon the race in a sense because their GC teammate is gone. They continue on, but the peloton is different for them now.

Any racer worth a salt always congratulates the work of the team, especially the domestiques (note this is a French word for “servant”). Only one winner wears the jersey but the whole team wins or loses. They all have their role in the peloton as being part of the team. From the servants to the stars, everyone who is good enough to make it to that level has a role in the peloton. Teams work with other teams and there is a lot of trust and brotherhood in the peloton. You get the sense, as a spectator, that everyone is looking out for one another even in the most brutal races. You’re part of something. A peloton.

The commentators speak of the peloton almost as a person (at least in English). It’s a beautiful entity to see when it works together, and it’s a major part of teamwork in cycling. The finish line is a small part of the actual race.

What I enjoy witnessing is how fierce competitors will say, “Chapeau” to the person that won. To the person that challenged them to their limits. Inspired them. Pushed their limits. Crushed their team.

According to the BBC Magazine “Chapeau” is :

…frequently used by cyclists to indicate respect for another’s achievements. By saying “chapeau”, which literally means “hat”, the rider is doffing his cap to a colleague for a good day’s riding.

That’s why the use of “a broken peloton” when talking about labor in higher education is brilliant.

Chapeau, Kate, what a wonderful image to blend time, respect, and labor:

We need to recognise that service time that isn’t costed is human time that isn’t valued. So until we properly cost all the services that universities have committed us to delivering, we’re going to be sprinting over the mountains in a broken peloton, endlessly trying to prove ourselves against those nearest to us.

Let’s keep thinking together about what it will take to slow this down. Even professional cycling costs the labour of the domestique.

Yes, and I think that’s the honest truth of it. We’re a broken peloton.

Before I can take on adjunct labor, higher education’s broken peloton, and the wonderful reading that Kate and others have proposed, I have to write about Nicole Cooke. Of all the stories in cycling, Cooke’s story is inspiring and pretty awful. While reading Kate’s post, I thought of Cooke.

On the one hand, what is written about her attitude chaps me as sexism. (She’s a bossy competitive woman, and the like). While on the other hand, I find her rage quite productive and honest. Um, hello, you don’t win a gold medal and world championship by being soft and kinda whimpy.

Nicole Cooke’s “Great Haul of China” in 2008 with her gold medal in Beijing is not as impressive as her stance on doping. When she retired, she said some brilliant critiques about how some cheaters were now profiting off of their stories in the form of memoirs. Here’s what she said about Lance Armstrong: 

And when Lance Armstrong ‘cries’ on Oprah later this week and she passes him the tissue, spare a thought for all those genuine people who walked away with no rewards – just shattered dreams,” she added. “Each one of them is worth a thousand Lances.”

And this from the same link about Tyler Hamilton’s memoir:

Please don’t reward people like Hamilton with money. That is the last thing he needs. Donate his literary prize and earnings to charity. There are many places infinitely more deserving than the filthy hands of Hamilton.

Ouch, but double-damn, she’s spot on. In essence, the cheaters are winning again by selling their stories. Cooke is the only cyclist I’ve seen tell like it is from a woman’s perspective:

I have been robbed by drugs cheats, but am fortunate, I am here with more in my basket and more jerseys than I dreamed off as a 12-year-old girl. But for many people who do ride clean, some are going through horrific financial turmoil.

And there’s a connection here that I promise I will try to bring together about adjunct labor, to companies trying to profit off of students, and the maddening role that educational technology is playing in destroying anything that even looks like a peloton.

Here’s the thing. For now. Here’s the thing:

I thought about the word abandon in another context a bit last week as I finished applying for several jobs. I have one file marked “Snowball In Hell” (these are jobs I know I won’t get), one stack is “Morals Be Damned” (think money not happiness for at least three-five years), and the other file is “Beach Boys” (as in Wouldn’t It Be Nice). These file names make me feel better, but really all of it just made me so completely sick of writing about myself, my accomplishments, and all that jazz.

I shared my exhaustion-and-I’m -glad-I’m-not-an-adjunct sigh over dinner with my friends. I was asked, “Why don’t you abandon a career in higher education and do something else?”

You know, like it’s that easy. I honestly didn’t know what to say other than, “I can’t see myself anywhere else. I love teachers, students, and learning.”

Kate writes again about the peloton, and I’ve edited this section:

When work itself becomes scarce, when whole professions vanish into the sinkholes of technology and automation, then the power to limit expectations of service shift decisively…

…because there is no guiding intelligence holding back the whole academic peleton from hurtling forwards at a pace that only a very few can sustain.

And that section was an answer for me that I didn’t have over dinner. I suppose I don’t abandon a career in higher education because I’m concerned about those sinkholes, automation, labor, and the pace that Kate has brought to our attention. Cycling, after all is a tour and a destination, and the clock causes the wins and losses.

And maybe I am so naive and stupidly optimistic, but I think these three questions below help me see why I can’t abandon the peloton.

How can we make things better? Why does it have to be this way? What can I do to help?

So I’ll take these questions, do some reading, think a bit, and then I’ll write some more. And then I’m going to ride my bike and think. This is by no means a full fledged blog post with a main point. It’s just my way saying Chapeau to Kate. And others who write about this issue. Who care. Who care to see a different peloton where the GC is on par with the domestique. A different time.

For now, I’ll leave you with a favorite quote of mine from the great French cyclist, Jacques Anquetil, on his feelings about winning a race by twelve sections.

He replied: It was eleven more than necessary. 

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Who We Are OL

This weekend I’m going backpacking with a guy who works in river conservation, a woman is a social justice librarian who regularly advocates for the poor, and a woman who used to work as a pro-choice lobbyist. I cannot wait to go into the backcountry with these people. They are interesting, smart, and they like to party in the woods. A trifecta of happiness for me, really. I’ve seen Mr. River and Ms. Librarian quite a bit in the last year, but I haven’t seen Ms. Pro-Choice in quite a while. The last time she and I hung out a lot, I was a complete and utter coward. I plan to express my remorse this weekend, and I thought I’d draft it here because this confession/apology is connected a bit to something I recently posted to the interwebs.

Alan Levine, or Mr. CogDog, as I call him in my head, put out a call for True Stories of Open Sharing. This weekend I was going through the digital file cabinet, so to speak, trying to see what kind of digital portfolio I could create to enhance my chances in the jobby job seeking. LinkedIn seems to just bring me spam emails from folks who want to sell me products as Director. My blog isn’t always “professional” and I don’t have a website. What’s the best thing to create if you’re on the job hunt in EdTech? Clearly, I don’t know. I mean, really, if somebody wants to know about me they can put my name in their search engine of choice and go from there.

This is a waste of time…if my CV doesn’t do it…maybe I should make a website…whatever, I gave up. I thought, what the heck, I’ll tell my story to Mr. CogDog and at least help him with his future preso. I didn’t follow his instructions (he wanted 2-3 minutes); I was a total wind bag. When I set up for my video, my dog dug his claws into my thighs and tried to escape so I didn’t say the introduction he wanted. Chalk it up to my regular MO as a student who gets excited about the start of an assignment so I don’t read the whole thing. I just jump in without thinking. There’s a larger metaphor for how I live my life here, but I want to stay on the topic of what I’ll say to Ms. Pro-Choice.

First, I want to thank her for teaching me to say Anti-Choice instead of Pro-Life. That small semantic shift is important to their cause. We want to point out that we are for life–we just also believe that a woman’s choice to terminate  or prevent a pregnancy is her decision. Pro-lifers, she taught me, see themselves as having the moral ground and that’s not true. We’re mainly supporting low-income women who don’t have health insurance, which is really most of what Planned Parenthood does.

Second, she asked me to be a part of a lawsuit and I turned her down. I agonized over this because I believe in the cause. This was the ill-fated Bush era of teaching abstinence in schools and there were numerous attacks on Planned Parenthood and other abortion providers. My reason for turning her down was plain and simple cowardice. I was scared of judgmental people. Back then, I was very intimidated by people who had strong negative opinions about this new-ish thing gaining ground called social media.

I overheard one powerful faculty member admit that she would not hire somebody who did not share her politics. That was me, but she had no idea, and I’d listen to her rant. I thought she was a right-wing hawk who was more of sexist pig than any card carrying NRA member with a penis. She liked me, and she could have decided my fate, so I was patient. Years of working in restaurants taught me to listen before you speak. I took pride in people not being able to guess my politics. And nothing, my friends, divides people more than abortion.

I went to fundraisers, 5k runs/walks, and talks all to support her organization, NARAL. Right-wing warriors would spit on the ground when we walked by, they had bullhorns to yell their hate, and some guy got in my face and yelled.

He told me that, and I quote, “love fucking more than my soul.” I didn’t say a word because we had been told to not engage with them. They had a right to protest. And let me tell you, it was an awesome inside joke between me and my friends for years. (Down with my soul, let’s get it on! I’m sorry, I wasn’t praying, I was thinking about what you look like without any clothes on. Is that a sin?–it devolves from here, so I’ll stop). That guy’s hatred, however, made me think about the real danger of one’s feminist political views. I rarely spend time with men who would be called “anti-feminist” or “woman hater” but I’ve never forgotten that guy.

Out of all the women that day, he chose my face to express his hatred for women.

He yelled after me as I walked away, “You have sex with the Devil, woman!”

How astute! I’ve been keeping the Devil for my friend for as far back as I can remember.

Ms. Librarian, who grew up Mormon with parents who still practice the faith (she does not), joined the lawsuit, and for that, I love her dearly. Back then, I was an adjunct who was absorbing all of the advice–good and bad–on how to survive and make it in academia.

According to popular media, academics were/are a hive of liberalism and left-wing fascists trained to indoctrinate the youth. During the Bush years, this was particular fun fodder for those of us who were ashamed of our our country’s policies. Somehow my use of Susan Sontag’s work in my English Composition courses was a conspiracy to turn your daughters into man-haters who would grow up to vote for policies to take away your guns. I had meetings with deans at least twice a year to defend my choice of reading material for students. Luckily, I had administrators who supported my academic freedom. But it made me suspicious about what was in my file, what was said about me in hiring committees, and who had which political views and why. I kept quiet on and off line.

So when I was asked to join this lawsuit, I declined because I was fearful about the exposure on the web. How it would affect my chances for a job. My career. My family. My friends. My spouse. My presence OL.

I used to use Elroy Strongjaws, my dog’s unofficial full-name, as my “identity” on the Internet. Doing that video for Mr. CogDog made me remember that I used to not use my name on the web. I totally forgot I used to do that, and now it seems so ridiculous. What was I thinking? Why was I so intimidated?

Had I chance to do it all over again, I’d give those depositions for NARAL. Those interviews. My time. My story as it connects to others. I’d put it out there on the Internet that I support birth control and woman’s right to choose. I missed an opportunity.

And that I regret. And I’m so honored that she asked me. Told me I was perfect for this cause. Begged me to say yes. And I regret saying no.

Because now I know, it doesn’t matter. People will think what they want, do what they want, and label you with or without a carefully curated “personae” online. Other people have written extensively about this idea, and I think it’s interesting. And I really didn’t think too much about an “online presence” outside of teaching until I attended a conference workshop on Twitter circa 2010.

I sauntered into the session because everything else during that hour bored me. Turns out, I was attending a preso for people who tweet on behalf of others. Folks, for instance, who have been hired to tweet on behalf of college presidents or other leaders at their institutions. Wow, I thought, is this for real? How to describe my utter shock that people got paid to do this–I was still pretty naive about the evils of the Internet at that time–maybe I still am. Maybe I should think more about my soul and less about hopping into the sack with Beelzebub).

When students would give me their email addresses, for instance, I used to help DopeSmokah247@yahooooey.calm understand that’s not the best email handle for scholarships and college applications. Oh, but that’s a joke, the student would say. Think about the message you’re sending with that handle, young grasshopper. But I haven’t smoked weed in long time, Ms. Indrunas, the student said blushing. Who cares, I said, that’s not the point.

Years later, I’m now wondering about that point between professionalism and who we really are. Most of us spend hours on the clock being somebody we’re not. We call this professionalism sometimes. Sometimes that’s cool. Sometimes it’s not. What is the point to honor this divide? Why? How does this divide affect people’s perception of themselves as leaders? Workers? Citizens? Part of a network?

It can be very scary to be who you really are at work, and this is nothing compared to a friend of mine who hides her sexuality at work. During the day, she’s this amazingly feminine make-up wearing professional. One the weekend, she’s this tomboyish lesbian sans make-up who slips out of her high-heels and suit for a pair of Vans and cargo shorts. Just like that. She clocks out and she’s herself. It’s her “work drag” as I recently learned to call it (Thanks, Tom Gibbons). How we look on the job versus how we dress off the clock.

For her, she works among homophobic folks so it’s easier to wear lipstick and high heels and “look straight” than it is to teach them about micro-aggressions about same sex couples. For some of us, how we look at work versus how we dress off the clock is akin to this online/offline personality. Who we are OL is like an outfit we can change. Or is it?

For some folks, it’s one and the same. For others, it’s not. And I worry for women the most, especially young women who are trying to please so many people’s visions for their future. I’ve been writing more for the Shrink It & Pink It idea, but I need to let it rest. Some ideas aren’t worth exploring when you’re too close to the moment. Back when Ms. Pro-Choice asked me to be a part of that lawsuit, I was too close to the conversation. Things could get ugly for us online, they told us. People could write things. Say things. Suggest things. I thought about the guy who got into my face, and I knew I could be teaching his daughters or sons that fall. I cared a great deal then about what students thought of me, my colleagues, and future employers. So much so, that I silenced my beliefs by not championing a cause I believe–and I regret that.

This is, in part, why I’ve never claimed these “tweets are my own” or any other separation of my soul–as damned as it may be–as an employee, scholar, writer, thinker, or as a person. At least I hope I’m smarter now.

The Devil, so to speak, is all in the details if you search hard enough.

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The Life of An #Adjunct

Yesterday a lovely art teacher and I chatted about our current woes with the workplace. She has that enviable ability to be both a skilled teacher and a fabulous artist. “You’re always going to a teacher,” she said, “you know that.”

No, I’m not, I admitted. I’m a presenter, a trainer, instructional designer, and/or an administrator. I haven’t written a syllabus or graded anybody’s work in almost two years. Maybe I’ll pick up an adjunct gig in the future, but teacher is an identity that I know I’ll never own again.

I wrote in my last post about being interviewed about my life as an adjunct, and I’d like to post the entire interview here for two reasons. 1] I have two presentations where I’m planning to discuss my ideas on how to improve professional development for adjuncts, and 2] I was going to save these ideas for another project, and today I realized that’s all silliness. I have no idea where things will be in six months, and these ideas are very much on my mind.

There are many, many writers who are taking on this topic of teacher labor, and I can’t say that I have anything new to add. I have no substantial ideas for organizing, political action, nor can I offer any solace to adjuncts. As I’ve read the news about “our historic reduction in tuition,” I’ve been troubled by the lack–if not downright omission–about the working conditions for teachers.

So, here’s what it was like for me. I’ve changed a few bits to protect the identity of the interviewer, and I don’t want to steal the thunder away from the article if/when it’s published. I also know that 1,000 of these words below will never make it to ink on the page. Here it is in the bloggity blog blog form.

1) The life of an adjunct (let’s not call ourselves associates; it’s a white-wash. Don’t you think?) is a life driven by past student debt, a poor and inequitable labor market, and minimal economic compensation. It is, in other words, unsustainable. To what degree did these forces effect your decision to leave teaching?

Yes, using other words like “associate” is akin to saying feces when it’s really shit. Sorry, you can’t print that–too crude. I agree, using other names for PT faculty gets away from their actual contingent nature. Adjuncts are, by their very title, not a permanent part of the institution. Using priority hiring by rank doesn’t address their actual need for consistent work. When I entered into the job market in 2003, I knew that things were not good for English composition instructors. I was advised, however, that there would be retirements and positions would open up. That just didn’t happen, and the recession made things worse. Having racked up significant debt made it really hard to constantly manage not getting paid for close to four months out of the year. It just seemed hopeless that I was ever going to get a job that was consistent, and it was for pure financial reasons that I went into administration. I can’t say that this was a path I saw for myself, but getting a consistent paycheck year-round has relaxed my shoulders a bit. I miss teaching and I probably always will.

2) Here is a follow up to question one. As a teacher, the combination of poor pay and lack of job security has always clashed with the message we are sending our students. One the one hand, we are teaching the under-advantaged and our promise is that education will pull them out wage-slavery and give them a better life—i.e., a livable wage.  And yet on the other hand, there we are, essentially being exploited by the same neoliberal economic system that has disenfranchised them, and will, in all likelihood, continue to do so after they graduate.  What are your thoughts here?

I found myself in a position where I had promising students who reminded me of my younger self and I could not in good faith give them advice on how to follow in my footsteps. Unlike my own professors who gave me tips and strategies on how to succeed in higher education, I found myself telling students to look for other options. One of my decisions to go back to school to change my career had to do with my dissatisfaction with not being able to mentor future teachers. How could I look a first-year first-generation student in the face and say that this was a good career path when I was paying for my own rent and groceries with a credit card? Since I am the first person in my family to graduate from college, much less go to graduate school, I feel a responsibility to help students who share a similar class background with me. Becoming a teacher is not a safe bet for anyone who was not born into the middle class. It bothered me that I couldn’t share the same advice that I received from my professors who believed in me and encouraged me.

For example, I worked for one college who hired me for fall quarter and they told me point blank they had no classes for me winter and spring. I took the job because I thought it was a foot in the door to work for them in the future. My blue collar parents taught me that hard work would eventually pay off, and as adjunct, that’s just not true. Nobody cares.

When students asked me what classes I was going teach next quarter, I had to explain to them that I wouldn’t be back until possibly next year. Maybe. One student stayed after class and apologized for not working harder because she wanted me to work there next quarter. She had tears in her eyes as she apologized for “the slackers in the class who made me not like teaching there.” This was an adult student who had learned how to read in her 30s. She loved John Grisham, and although I loathe that genre of novels, I read The Firm so we could talk about it. She was a gem. I had to explain to her that I wasn’t being hired back; I loved teaching them. It was a painful conversation. How do you explain to students what it means to be an adjunct?

3) What have you learned about the role adjuncts play in the college eco-sphere now that you are sitting at the table with the real power players—the VPs and Deans who are tasked with running the college?

On one hand, I’m really a middle middle manager, and I don’t get to sit at the table at all with the upper-administration. I’m invited to Deans Council once a year, and I report to a dean who is an advocate for online education. The major decisions about eLearning are made way above me. Faculty, departments, and divisions have more power than I do when it comes to the direction of eLearning. I’m really just glorified tech support.

On the other hand, I get to network with the eLearning Council and the state board. That work is important and we have one of the healthiest consortium collaborations that I know of in eLearning. That work has been rewarding, and I get to represent the college by advocating for teaching and learning with like-minded colleagues from around the state. The title of Director has given me many opportunities and I’m really passionate about learning more about policy at the state board level; that’s where broad sweeping change can happen for the better or for the worse. I’d wager that some of the power-players, as you call them, have no idea what I do for the college.

4) What do you think of the emphasis on vocational and professional training? Prof Tech has always been part of the junior college mission. Are things any different now? Or, to phrase the question another way, to what degree does corporate funding for Prof. Tech impact pedagogy and curriculum?

The emphasis on Prof. Tech is industry-driven in this area. If it wasn’t for Boeing, nobody outside of Washington would know of Seattle (prior to Microsoft, of course). The community college mission is to serve the local community, yet there is a fair investment from private industry. That being said, private industry is invested in training not education. There’s a difference. When the emphasis is on job skills, the liberal arts suffer. The open door policy from the Truman Commission assumed state support, and as the public investment in education deteriorates, the college has to look for other investors.

5) Do you have any thoughts on FT hiring practices? Many FT hires have come from outside the college. This is standard practice, of course, at four-years. But in the past, community colleges often hired from within.  Is this change an institutional change or just the luck of the applicant draw? Also, you spoke in a previous email about priority hiring. Forgive my ignorance, but what does that term mean, and why did you say that it was, in your view, unsustainable?

I have very little insight to the FT hiring practices, but I think you are hurting your chances as an adjunct by trying to jockey for a future position. I once was given the advice, “Keep your mouth shut until you get tenure.” Unfortunately, I think that’s sound advice. You are burning a bridge at any time with FT colleagues who may or may not like your politics, curriculum, or personality. I’ve even heard FT faculty say that s/he wouldn’t want to hire an innovative PT faculty member because he or she may make them look bad. Getting a FT job is like joining the mafia; you really don’t know how it works until you’ve been made. I was never made.

Priority hiring is the practice of scheduling adjuncts based on rank or date of hire. A more evil practice is based on course load and benefits. Some colleges will hire what is called a 2-1-2. You’re hired for two classes one quarter, one the next, and two the next. That way you’re never eligible for benefits because you have to work two consecutive quarters to qualify. The 2-1-2, albeit never truly written as policy anywhere, is a common practice to make sure adjuncts do not get benefits. The ACA is really challenging this practice, so we’ll see what happens.

6) Finally, any last thoughts? If you could tell the readers anything about the adjunct crisis in America, what would you tell them?

I would tell them that the adjunctification of teaching labor was never meant to be a career track. Yes, some working professionals teach on the side to make extra money. Yes, some retirees take on adjunct work to supplement their income and share their expertise. Yes, some people like the flexibility of being an adjunct. But really, most adjuncts want better working conditions and they care a great deal about students, their disciplines, and their careers.

Every day I was an adjunct was better than when I was a waitress, but sadly I made more hourly by asking what type of tequila people wanted in their margaritas than I ever did as a educator.

I stuck with teaching because I loved it. Most educators do not go into this profession thinking they will get rich. They do, however, think they will be able to earn a modest income to support themselves. The time they devote towards trying to make ends meet directly influences the time they should be putting towards teaching. The administration likes to focus on student success quite a bit these days but you can’t have successful students without adequate support for teachers.

Right now, we have teachers wasting their time and energy jumping hoops to apply for unemployment when they could be researching, writing, and collaborating to improve their courses for the fall.

Tuition, after all, will be lower.

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The Free Bin

I got the most delightful email from somebody I barely know this week. Apparently she found a magazine with one of my published articles in a “free bin” at the library, and when she opened it up to read it, she recognized my mug on the author bio page. She emailed me to tell me she liked the article and hoped I was still writing. FWIW, she said.

It’s worth a lot. Thank you for sending me that random inquiry. Having somebody find my work in the Free Bin at the public library brings tears to my eyes. Damn, I love the Free Bin! A kindred spirit, indeed. Honestly, it’s the only way I can tolerate reading right wing propaganda and various magazines I would never buy. Part of me knows I should leave the magazines for people who are less fortunate than me, but I’m a Free Bin hound. When I’m done with my reading, I return them on the sly.

But no, lovely emailer who found me in the Free Bin, I’m not doing that kind of writing anymore.

For about two years, I had a side freelance writing gig. I collaborated with the editors. Listened to the sage advice of fellow writers that I respect. Learned a lot about the publishing process. Got giddy when the magazine would hit the stands. Mailed copies to my parents. A few times random strangers would tell me they loved my article on So and So, and it was really cool to hear their stories when they told them to me. It was a cool way to network with people who liked to hike or ride bikes.

Then the magazine got sold and the new editor was not so thrilled with my work. I started to send my work to other magazines, and after about six months, I got a boat load of rejections. No this. Not that. Why this. Why that. Then one particularly mean-spirited vicious attack on my writing ability came into my mailbox. And so I hung it up. Said so-long. Let it go, I told myself. I watched my aspirations to be a writer float into the sky like a red balloon. Or all 99 of them.

I was a busy adjunct at the time trying to make ends meet while studying up to change my career. Not the best time to focus for a writer, really. It was maddening. I spent all day teaching people who hated to write yet I had no time to write myself. (High-five, Comp Teachers). When I did outdoorsy kinds of stuff, friends would say, “You should write about this.”

Meh. Change the subject.

Now I’m starting to rethink that outdoorsy-writer thing. I’m finally in a place where I can focus on some ideas that are really fun and exciting to me professionally, so maybe I can squeeze some time in for the personal writing. Some time.

A couple of weeks back, I spent some time emailing back and forth with a writer who is researching about adjunct labor and thought I might be able to help him. He’s a friend/colleague so I agreed. He offered to keep my quotes anonymous, but that makes me feel like a coward. Like I’m ashamed to critique the very system of exploitation that turns my stomach. Like I have anything to hide. What’s the point of telling the truth if you’re going to hide behind anonymity? You’re on the job market, he said, so you may not want to claim these ideas.

True. I suppose. Maybe I’ll regret being interviewed for that magazine someday. Maybe not. I can’t wait to read it, honestly. I read a couple of lines to my adjunct friends and they laughed, smiled, and said a couple “Fuck yeahs.” Even if those quotes aren’t published, I had a darn fine time sharing my ideas with my friends.

Maybe long after that magazine is published, somebody will eventually find it in a Free Bin at the library.

Our email exchange got me thinking about when I did the outdoorsy article writing. When I was an adjunct. Before I was a blogger. Before I tweeted. Before I did a lot of what I do today.

So guess what? And this is totally going to surprise you if you read this blog regularly. You guessed it. Yep. The federated wiki. So predictable, I know. But damn, it’s working for me. Or it feels like it’s working. Whatever. I can’t explain it. I’ll bumble through something intellectually stimulating in the fall at conferences. That is, if I don’t stun myself into a total panic that I am planning on presenting on these ideas at conferences. But that’s in the future. Holycats, I have some big projects to complete before the fall. Holyhotdamn I can’t believe what I’ve got myself into this autumn. Write a title and blurb. See what happens.

[I stared at the wall here for like 15 minutes. I’ll write about all that later, I thought. I stared at the wall some more.]

Where was I? The Free Bin and the Federated Wiki. Right.

So let’s see how an outdoorsy article writer works with the federated wiki. Two weeks or so ago, I started by writing a little something titled Stars & Evergreen Fire Lookout. My friends and I rented a fire lookout in the central North Cascades Mountains. A little mid-week vacation in a beautiful place and I volunteered to do some research. I gathered all I could find on the Internet. I checked out books from the library. I read. And read. Took some notes. And the next thing I know, I kind of really liked my page.

I can see how all of the little bits could become an article. How the history of fire lookouts mirror changes in technology. Changes in human behavior. Changes in priorities. Changes that I think I could write about. Maybe somebody else would fork it. Read it. Maybe not.

I read late into the night, and when I stumbled upon “star gazing” being listed as an activity at the lookout, I took that as a sign I wasn’t going to find anything better.

Gazing at stars as an activity. Yes. Then I found this beauty the next morning.

If you look closely, you can see Bob Norton and Mokie, the happiest dog ever. Mr. Norton, it turns out, was a “trail man” and his life sounds kind of dreamy to me. It sort of looks like he’s holding a flask. Hope it was whiskey.

This got me thinking about the people who did long distance trekking back before GPS, titanium light fancy-ass gear, and other modern recreational equipment. Look at Bob rocking the external frame pack. Old school. Bob stayed at our fire lookout back in the day. Helped build the trails to get there. What a guy, that Bob.

When I got to the lookout, there was a handout with directions on how to use the stove, and such. On the handout was a short story about two fire lookout employees who fell in love via walky talky. Networking by technological means, be still my heart.

I started to imagine what their conversations must have been like. Batteries were most likely scarce and necessary for their jobs. No long conversations. No letters. No phone. How did they fall in love? Maybe they did a quick flirt from afar by sending signals.

Here’s how I imagine an early conversation after the second date–which was like three months apart because they couldn’t leave their stations until they needed supplies. They had a job to do, man.

Him: Low on salt pork and peanut butter. You?

Her: I still have some jerky. Soup cans galore. (Pause) Light your lantern if you’ve thought about me more than once today.

Him: Lights lantern. Holds it up to the window. Sees her lantern light. Gives a mountain yowl he knows she can’t hear. 

Her: Turn it off if you think you’ll dream about me.

Him: Stumbles, almost trips, almost breaks the lantern to turn if off as fast as possible. Darkness. 

Her: Sweet dreams. Over and out. Darkness.

Totally silly, this imagination of mine, right? But they were married for thirty years after “courting” via the lookouts and walky talkies. Something totally hot happened that must have been exhilarating yet really lonely. I’ve sketched all kinds of ideas of where I could take this history lesson to possibly a hiking article or creative nonfiction.

I’ve got a start in the federated wiki which is a bit like that Free Bin at the library for me lately when I have time for it. This is a new idea I’ve been thinking about, and I haven’t quite tuned into the frequency on how to explain Federated Wiki as Free Bin idea.

Maybe it will come to me while I’m staring at a wall or at the stars. Until then, I’ll leave you with words of John Muir:

When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the universe.

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